Sunday 7 August 2022

































There was a guy who I saw a couple of times
in the comedy tent at the Glastonbury festival.
His 'act' was to play vinyl records
then get the audience to vote by perceived loudness of shouting
on whether the disc went to vinyl heaven
which involved the record being lovingly replaced into it's sleeve
accompanied by the sound of an angelic choir
or Vinyl Hell resulting in the platter being nailed to a wooden post
and smashed to pieces with a lump hammer.
He starts with a soft target, say, Donny Osmond.
The Glasto crusties condemn him to the hammer overwhelmingly.
Led Zep's 'Whole Lotta Love' is spared to resounding cheers.
Then it gets interesting...
He gradually plays cuts that split the crowd.
By the end it's chaos.
Disgruntled ABBA fans puch boyfriends for downvoting 'Dancing Queen'.
Whitesnake fans are left in tears
as shards of 'Fool for Your Lovin' explode across the stage.
I remember the sense of isolation I felt as Lionel Richie bit the dust.
Hey I like that album you bastards!
regards
Titus

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